Success… success… success…

November 24, 2008

I am struggling. Between commitment to success and the fear of it. Fear of success, or the proccess of getting there – which one is it?

And why do I think that I am a little person?

-Because that is precisely what I think – I am a little, invisible, unrecognisable person, one of the billions on Earth. I think, that I have no right to be on the top, to claim the fame, money, attention, adoration, because there many of us, and I am only another one of the many. It’s statistics. The odds are against me. Why should I be more successful than the majority? What makes me different, how can I hope to be better than the others?

– Not better! But the point is, if I don’t believe in my uniqueness, than I don’t become unique, don’t achieve, don’t try, don’t realise my better self! So, I must believe in myself, my uniqueness, my betterness?.. Or what?

Fight between arrogance and humbleness. Modesty and pride. Isn’t there anything more wholesome than any of these qualities? Something which doesn’t contain the constant tag-of-war in it’s tisue.

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